Five Minutes

I remember a time when I was in bed with my son who was asleep but wakes up around the same time as I looked down on my baby as he was waking up our eyes met and at that time I knew we were connected. His eyes was looking at me like mommy help me, before he went into his first seizure, at 7 months. In the 5 minutes everything I knew changed. It woke me up. I no longer felt like fuck life because a life I made needs me. I was now a protector. In them 5 minutes my heart broke and healed at the same time. I realized who I was and the strength I possessed then.

“It might be that to surrender to happened was to accept defeat, but it was a defeat better than many victories.”

- Tookes